Friday, 15 May 2015

Battling Hair Loss

Hair loss is a big deal. For both girls and boys. And I dont just mean the hair on your head, your eyelashes, your eyebrows, your leg hair (which girls may jump for joy about), any hair on your body may begin to thin and fall out due to chemotherapy.

My mum had blessed me with long, thick brown hair which I loved. Sometimes I would moan about it; my hair fell out on a daily basis anyway, I would get headaches if my hair was tied up for too long, it would get stuck in my jacket zipper and bags, curls would drop out after seconds. Sometimes it was just a nightmare. But I still loved my hair. I won the ‘Best Hair’ award at school. I hated going to the hairdressers just to get a little trim. I never thought in a million years I would be left with no hair on my head. I was born with more hair than I have now. But I have finally been able to accept my situation and all the side effects that comes with it which includes hair loss.

I haven't always been so acceptable with my hair loss though. So I would be wrong to sit here and say that its fine. But I can sit here and say that it gets better. I cried, and cried, and cried. So I think I've established that its okay to cry. I had only been receiving chemotherapy for a week and my hair was beginning to fall out everywhere. I would brush my hair in the mirror and watch it gracefully come out in the brush in huge clumps. I would go in the shower, and cry (shock) as I watched my hair fall out in my hands. It also felt extremely dry and horrible. But it wasnt just for me that I was scared about loosing my hair, it was my boyfriend too. I didn't want him to think I was ugly and didnt want him to look at me. The first day I saw him when huge amounts of my hair had fallen out, I just stood at the top of the stairs and cried whilst looking down at him.

To my surprise, some strands of hair seemed to be clinging on for dear life and wouldn't fall out. I couldn't bring myself to shave those strands off for a long time as they were all I had. But finally, one day me and my friend went into a hairdressers and asked them to shave it for me. I was so surprised at how smooth my head was and I literally could not stop touching it. I had a peanut head. To my surprise again, it began to grow back after a week. So off we went to purchase myself some mens babyliss clippers.

The more I shaved my hair, the more my hair grew back.  But this is my personal experience, and I cant sit here and say your hair will start to grow back like mine during intense chemotherapy. I have now given up with shaving and just letting my hair be. It is still growing and I currently have a little fuzz ball on my head. My next treatment cycle (delayed intensification) contains a chemotherapy that is renound for making your hair fall out. But with my hair being such a fighter to come back, I’m just going to see whether it will fall out again or not. If it does, it does. If it doesnt, it just means I have a little head start to my hair growth for the summer. 

Before & After 

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