If your abit like me, you don't like crying. Crying shows vulnerability. And who wants to show people that they are vulnerable? Its like an antelope saying "hey you lions come and eat me".
When I was first diagnosed, Niagara falls fell down my cheeks. But to be honest, I cant remember when I stopped crying. Probably when I had nothing left in me. And this was just the beginning.
I've cried in a range of situations since. And just to mention a few.. I cried when I got to the hospital. I cried because I couldn't sleep. I cried because I couldn't be discharged. I cried when I was discharged. I cried when I got home for the first time. I cried when my hair fell out. I cried because I felt sorry for myself. I cried because I felt alone. I cried thinking about the future. I cried thinking about my boyfriend. I cried seeing my appearance change. I cried, ALOT.
But I just wanted to say that its okay to cry. And you should cry. And if you don't, your a robot.
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